Many people are rightfully apprehensive about entering into a marriage. After all, nearly half of the marriages in America end in divorce. Interestingly, most of the concerns that my single friends have about marriage seem to hover around the same question: Does marriage suck? My response is always the same.
Relationships are complex. Occasionally, they can be difficult. Instead of pretending as if marriage is some utopian institution, I want to compare how we view the difficulties within a marriage to how we view other difficulties in life. I know people who have graduated from elite academic institutions, completed grueling triathlons, built successful businesses, and won political races.
Do you know what they all have in common?
They embraced their respective challenges, welcomed the opportunities that they presented, and delighted in overcoming them. In addition, they associated a certain level of prestige with being able to triumph over adversity. Their difficulties became a source of pride.
What if we approached the problems within a marriage in the same way?
Granted, not all marriages are going to be successful, and those that end in divorce are not necessarily because of any one person’s shortcomings. Still, I am convinced that marriage, like any other meaningful endeavor, has the ability to summon something greater in us. That is, of course, if we choose to look at it that way.